There are many addictions in life. I’ve had my fair share of them. Everything from alcoholism, drugs, even sex; I never thought I would be addicted to money.
The phrase “time is valuable” has so many meanings. When your addicted to money every second your not working your thinking about your budget.
I started working when I was about 16. Little odd and end jobs until I was 18. I got my first real grown up job. It was a 9-5, paid really well, but only an internship. After that summer I went into retail. I quickly became a full time key holder, and continued on this path for a few years.
During that time the majority of my money was wasted on partying the night away and staying alert during the day; basically alcohol & cocaine at night; meth & caffeine in the morning.
My first attempt at “sobering up” I attempted to cut everything out cold turkey. That didn’t go over very well. I basically gave up on life. Quit my job, quit my friends, quit my family, quit on everything.
I remember it very well. The cold sweats, the night terrors, the shadow people, sleeping for days, waking up so hungry because i didn’t/couldn’t eat for days. This first cycle of “sobriety” lasted all of 4 days after I couldn’t handle the withdrawals; I turned to the bottle. Alcohol helped me sleep thru drug withdrawals.
Alcohol has been in my family for years; been with me since I was 13. By the time I was finally old enough to make my own decisions “a legal 18 year old” I was drinking almost a liter every few days. When I moved out of my moms house it became a bottle a night.
Sorry I digressed, when I turned 21 I had my second revelation and attempt at “sobering up” that year ALSO didn’t go as planned. I no longer could afford to drink a bottle a night, so I went with the cheaper option. I partied with Meth. There is much I can say about my history with it, but that’s for another post.
Thru all my addictions none of them have been as powerful as my addiction to money. During the times I would be “drug free” for a week or so I ALWAYS found a new job, new gig, new way of making money. Which brings me to my current attempt at sobriety.
I didn’t realize how much I allowed money to motivate me until this new year. When I moved to Florida I vowed to not fall back into the similar lifestyles I had in Vegas and I’ve kept my promise on that. I’ve had a few slip ups, but working two jobs wouldn’t allow the addictions to over take my life. Working two jobs however has its downfalls. Yes, I have a decent amount of money, but I have no time to reflect, to learn, to grow, to enjoy. Money comes and goes, but experiences are once in a lifetime. I’ve decided that no amount of money will make me happy.
Happiness comes from within. I will find my inner sunflower and let it flourish and grow. I will point my head towards the sun and fly. It’s my time. It’s your time. It’s our time.
Share your journey with me using #sunfloweritup or contact me via IG or FB I’d love to be there. 🙂
Until next week,